A Secret Admirer?

One of my admin girls fancies me!

All the signs are there. She has it bad. She smiles when she sees me. Laughs at my crap jokes. Does exactly what I ask of her. Never complains. Always willing. Makes me tea for no reason, she just does it. It’s been going on for weeks. What a girl!

You’re thinking: she’s my admin girl and therefore, is paid to be willing, laughs at my jokes because I’m her boss and makes me tea because she is fishing for promotion. NEVER. If I were her age, 26, I wouldn’t have noticed, she isn’t my type.

When you are 40 something and suffering from midlife crisis disease, everyone who shows a fleeting interest potentially fancies you, and everyone is ‘your type’ and she is……

You have to remember that while at home with the wife, the only attention I get is when something around the house needs fixing or she needs some money for new clothes. Let me clarify, ‘attention ’, doesn’t mean sex. No, No. I’d have to buy her a new car for that or try out my ‘prostitute theory’ as mentioned in another post.

Back to my admin girl: Single. Blonde. A fan of heavy make up, in fact, when she says she puts her face on in the morning, I think she ‘literally ’ does.

In reality, where I occasionally visit, I can’t have an affair with her. a. Because she doesn’t actually fancy me, it’s all a wicked trick of the mind designed to make me feel good. b. She works for me. Never poke the payroll! Oh and I nearly forgot. c. I’m married with 2 kids, not that that has stopped half the population in the past. Why should I be any different?

I have this strange feeling people in the office are laughing at me while I sub-consciously (or consciously), flirt, smile and pretend I’m a fun, happy-go-lucky middle aged guy who never really grew up (sad Muppet in other words). I start laughing at her jokes even when she hasn’t made any. I’m embarrassing myself. Yet, I can’t stop....

Is it possible that a 26 year old would fancy a 40 something openly having a crisis, mentally and physically? She might feel sorry for me and I could capitalise on this. Maybe she’s after promotion. Would I shag my admin girl if I knew it was purely for financial and personal gain-on her behalf? Hell yes. I’m having a mid-life crisis after all!

1 comment:

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